Divorce can be stressful for children, and it’s important for parents to work together to reduce this stress when possible. Parents don’t have to be on good terms themselves. But they do need to put their children first and focus on stability and security.
For example, it’s generally unwise for parents to make children pick sides. How does this kind of scenario unfold and how can you avoid it if you’re co-parenting a child with your ex?
Deciding where to live
Sometimes, in the wake of their parents’ split, children are asked where they would like to live while child custody is being determined. There are some situations in which children can express their desires and the court will consider them. So, older children shouldn’t necessarily be removed from this process entirely. But, at the same time, parents shouldn’t make them feel like they have to choose which parent they love more or which one they want to spend time with. If older children have strong preferences, they should feel free to express them, but they shouldn’t be pressured to do so.
Making negative comments
Another thing to avoid is badmouthing your ex in front of your children. Don’t blame your ex for the divorce vocally, even if you privately do blame them. Don’t make children take messages back and forth between the two of you. Don’t insult your ex and then make the children feel like they have to choose. which parent is “right or wrong.” This can be highly detrimental to their development moving forward.
This is just one thing to keep in mind when getting a divorce when children are involved. By seeking legal guidance, you can better ensure that your rights, and your children’s rights, are protected moving forward.
